Just another day in Thailand

Yesterday I woke up late (around 7:30) after drifting in and out of sleep since 5am when the roosters and pigs start their daily morning ritual of shrieking outside my window. I wander downstairs to see what strange food experience awaits me and find grilled chicken and sticky rice. While this may seem like an odd breakfast, it is far more normal than most meals I eat here and I was so excited to wolf down some regular grilled chicken. But alas, before I can finish eating my Meh comes in and says Kaylaaa do you want to go to "ban soap" with me. I say sure so she whisks away my grilled chicken and clicks her tongue at me to tell me to hurry up and get dressed. I throw on some knee length shorts and a light blue t-shirt and head out the door. This whole time I really have no idea what ban soap is, but I am assuming it is just the home of someone named soap, since ban means home. But of course I misunderstood yet again. We walk into a family compound with around a hundred people all dressed entirely in black. Large groups of women are cooking ridiculous amounts of food (whatever you're thinking think more) and groups of men are arranging chairs and carving wood. My first thought was maybe it was a catering service (stupid I know), but nope, it was a funeral. I am quickly surrounded by women grabbing my arms and hands, turning them over, rubbing them, and exclaiming at how white I am. At one point someone even slapped my butt. Then I am sent over to the older women to have the experience repeated. The older women are all splitting small pieces of wood and then carefully putting money into the wood and shoving it into coconuts in pretty arrangements. I help them do this while they all shout questions at me and I try to answer question after question in a language that I am not at all comfortable with yet. This whole time I am sitting on a bamboo mat on the floor with all of these women in their 70's and 80's. My legs are killing me and no matter how many times I rearrange them they fall asleep and get stiff. When I stand up I can hardly walk and all these women jump up and appear to be in no pain at all. I end up staying there for 4 hours, and still have no idea who the funeral was for, whose house I was at, or why I was sticking money into coconuts. 

My afternoon consisted of trying to read my kindle but having kids constantly come up and tap the screen so I lose my page, eating honey from a beehive that someone just happened to find and extract from a tree, eating a coconut that a monkey just happened to knock down from a tree in the yard, and hanging out with all of the people in the neighborhood. My days in Thailand never go quite as expected and each day has its own little bit of craziness.